


Reflections on Not Great Choices

by AlabasterMoonbeam



Series: Plus Size Sara Ryder [10]
Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Jaal loves her so much, Means I get to make it up!, Plus Size Ryder, Plus Size Sara Ryder, Sara has some abandonment issues (imagine that!), Sugary sweet, Yay for Future Science!, broken ribs, i went there, plus size, the english patient, woot!, yep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-07 00:35:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11047620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlabasterMoonbeam/pseuds/AlabasterMoonbeam
Summary: Jaal is busy on Aya, so Sara takes the F-String out for a spin.  It does not go well.  On the upside, cute cuddles and confessions that are heard unbeknownst to the confessor.(Yes, Peebee makes this squad an F)





	Reflections on Not Great Choices

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so a few heads up:  
> First thing, I'm not (surprisingly) a doctor, or a nurse, or really anyone who has more than a high school understanding of bio/anatomy/physiology. So I gave Ryder some broken ribs and bruised lungs. She recovers from both pretty darn quickly, because SCIENCE and SAM and FUTURE SCIENCE! I don't have any idea how fast or slow this would be in our present or anything. But, hey, SciFi anything goes (kinda)!  
> Second thing, I'm sorry if you like Peebee and don't like how I have written her. I don't like her, and so I wrote her how I see her. If you do like her then I think you should write your own fic about her and maybe tell me about it so I can expand my horizons. But please don't harangue me about how mean I am to her. She bugs me and (right now) I can only see her as a liability in a combat situation.  
> Third thing, my Sara Ryder is plus size. Whatever you think is plus size is plus size. If you think of a size 8 being plus size then ok. If you think of plus size as being size 22, great! Or if plus size means being incredibly strong with maybe a little cushioning around those muscles, that's good too! I am not here to debate the reality of Ryder being plus sized (or the reality of writing and creating plus size characters in video games in general) but only to fill the niche of the lack of representation and how my head cannon works. Um, yeah. Ok
> 
> Sorry for the looooong notes, if you want more of me come say hi on tumblr @kaylamoonbeam and um... see how often I post about feminism and puppies. It's a lot.

It was odd, exploring without Jaal. She’d done it a few different times when needs required it, but each time it was strange. This time it was because Jaal was on Aya for a Resistance meeting, something about relief teams and counter strikes and who knew what else Evfra would find to talk about. As such, Sara gave Vetra some time off, too, and took Liam and Peebee out with her on her next trip to clear out a raider camp. Maybe, she thought as she coughed up some blood, they weren’t the best pair to have brought. To be fair, Liam did his best and patched her up, but they were tied up in a raider camp. Peebee had pissed off the remaining raiders, so they knocked her out. It made sense, considering she kept yelling about Remnant. There weren’t many left, and no one particularly strong, but broken ribs were broken ribs, and Liam could only do so much. They really needed Lexi to actually fix them up. Liam’s nose wasn’t broken but it was revolting to look at and of course Peebee was out cold. Or was she?  
Sara noticed that Peebee was coming around. The raiders had left Peebee untied since she had been unconscious, but now she was shifting. Slowly she sat up and looked from Liam to Sara. Then she looked at their bindings, and quickly untied them. Say what you might for the asari, and Sara would definitely do so later, but at least she was getting quicker on the uptake. Liam and Peebee both had to help Sara to her feet, but as soon as she was standing she whispered out orders to them. Get their guns, kill the remaining raiders, get to the Nomad, return to the Tempest. As it turned out, the Nomad was close, so she sent Peebee to loot the camp while Liam used some purified water they found to try to soak the dried blood from his nose. There was a good amount of loot, and when the Tempest came to collect them, Sara sent Drack out to help load it into the cargo bay. Then, with Cora’s help, Sara and Liam lurched their way to Lexi and the medbay.

“Fractured ribs and a pulmonary contusion,” Lexi’s voice was fuzzy, as was the voice of whoever she was talking to.  
“What the hell caused that?” Cora sounded confused, as if no one had ever had broken ribs and bruised lungs.  
“Probably the krogan that hit me,” Sara croaked out the words like the opening of an ancient lock, “Fair turn around though, I did shoot him after.”  
Coughing again, Sara felt the bed in the medbay move her into a sitting position. Wiping her mouth, Sara was chagrined to see that there were still a few small, bright spots of blood in her spittle. Gross. Still, she felt better, like her ribs had been broken a week ago, instead of hours. She knew that in a week her bones would be perfectly knit, good as new, but she wasn’t sure about her lungs. How long did they take to heal? As if reading her mind, Lexi supplied the answer, “You should be completely healed by the end of next week, assuming there was nothing else wrong that we somehow missed. Any remaining blood you cough up is… well, something like a scab.”  
Sara grimaced at that idea before she heard someone clear their throat in the doorway. Liam and Peebee both stood there, Liam’s nose looked better, too, already turning a disgusting combination of reds, greens, and yellows. Peebee had a smallish goose-egg on her forehead where they had hit her, but other than that seemed pretty chipper. They both came in to check on her, and both left with the admonishing Cora behind them, telling Peebee that she had to take situational combat training for the next three weeks because of this. Sara didn’t have the strength or the inclination to stop her.  
“Sara, you are very lucky that you have SAM. He helped stop the bleeding much more quickly than a regular person, and he helped keep your bones from puncturing your lungs,” Lexi stood next to Sara in total Doctor Mode.  
“I’m sorry, Lexi,” Sara intoned, head bowed, “but on the upside, I didn’t die this time. So, really, things are looking up.”  
“Lexi, I am sorry that I worry you with Ryder so often. It really wasn’t her fault--” SAM tried to explain before Lexi cut him off.  
“I know,” she looked at Sara, “Liam told me how Peebee distracted you. It left you more vulnerable to the hit and, since it was a krogan, the lack of forewarning, well, you know. For what it’s worth, Peebee also came in and told me it was her fault.”  
“Yeah, well-” Sara was interrupted by Kallo telling the crew they were approaching the landing zone for Aya, “Shit! Lexi, how long have I been out?”  
“Less than a day, but right after we picked you up, Jaal contacted Kallo and said they were finished with their meeting. We plotted a route directly at that point.”  
Sara slowly put her feet on the floor and began to shuffle herself back to her quarters. She knew she only had about fifteen minutes to make herself as presentable as she could before Jaal was back on board. In between brushing her teeth and rinsing her mouth with mouthwash, she commed Vetra to come help her change her clothes. She wanted nothing more than to be in her hoodie right now. Just as she was running a comb through her hair, Sara heard and felt the landing, and made her way to the docks. Walking cautiously with Vetra, Sara had just stepped foot in the market when Jaal came up to her and hugged her. The agonized gasp that Sara let out made Jaal release her instantly. Before he even had a chance to ask, Vetra gave the angara the whole story. Sara watched him carefully, seeing the rage and concern warring in the galaxies that were his eyes. Then, with incredible care and gentleness, Jaal lifted Sara into his arms and carried her back to the Tempest.  
***  
Sitting on her bed, Sara was glad that the week of broken ribs had passed relatively quietly. Vetra was there with her, discussing some new crush Sid had on a Nexus citizen, when there was a yelp from the cargo hold, followed by a string of cursing; Peebee’s first week of combat training had started, and by the sounds of it, she was none too pleased.  
“I’ll never understand why you took her with you,” Vetra watched Sara move to look at the viability statistics, her back to the open door, “unless it was specifically to piss off Jaal.”  
“No, it wasn’t…” Sara said unconvincingly, her weight shifting with her lie, “at least, not exactly.”  
Vetra sat quietly, waiting for Sara to continue.  
“It’s just… I was jealous. And I’m an idiot.”  
“Jealous of what? Jealous that Peebee spends all of her time on the Tempest waiting for the opportunity to run?”  
“No,” Sara sighed, “I… Jaal is just so… Jaal.” Sara’s voice faltered, as she tried to explain. The man in question was walking down the hall right then and moved closer when he heard his name. Vetra looked at him and held one finger to her lips.  
“I have heard the other angara, men and women, talking about him. They all want him.”  
“Yeah,” Vetra glanced back to her friend, “but he wants you.”  
“For now,” came the defeated reply, “I’m just trying to prepare for the inevitable departure, at least romantically, from me.”  
“Hmmm… maybe you should talk to him about it?” Vetra suggested, laughing silently at the surprised look on Jaal’s face as he processed Sara’s unwitting revelation.  
“No,” Sara’s statement was sharp, “at least, not yet. There are real things to worry about, like me not avoiding the Nexus any longer.”  
With a sigh, Vetra got up, gave her friend a quick hug and walked away. Jaal waited about thirty seconds before he came in.  
“Hello, dear one,” He wrapped his arms around Sara and kissed her neck, trying to pour into the embrace all his unspoken love for her.  
“Hello, sorry, but I’ve got to tell Kallo to head for the Nexus, then I’ll come back down, ok?” Sara leaned into Jaal, unwilling to leave for this minor errand. Instead, Jaal contacted Kallo via comm and placed the request for her, moving Sara to the couch to sit her on his lap. Jaal rubbed her shoulder and upper arm in a calming motion, while he moved his other hand to play some media file Liam had found. It was a film about a Hungarian count who was a wanderer and a fool. Sara loved this film, even as it made her weep.  
“Some of these scenes,” Jaal rumbled in her ear, his warm breath tickling her skin, “make me think of Elaaden. The sand and desert. Except, there are nights in those deserts, and none on Elaaden.”  
“Yes,” Sara sighed, waiting for one of her favorite lines to be spoken, her eyes closed in anticipation.  
“...for the heart is an organ of fire…”  
“Is that your favorite line?” Jaal shifted to look at her.  
“Yes. And no. They are all my favorite at different times.” Her eyes were closed, and she was clearly tired. Jaal watched her as she smiled quietly, and thought about the line. It was only part of it. It began by talking about betrayal, and how new lovers smash everything because the heart is an organ of fire. He knew it was an idiom, but he liked it as well. Sara’s breath became slow, deepened. She had stayed awake to hear the line, but now had drifted into sleep. Jaal carefully lifted her, relishing in her softness against him, and carried her to bed. As he set her down, her hands clung to him, grasping his rofjinn in her fists, then she relaxed, her hands slipping from him. Jaal drew up the covers and kissed Sara’s temple. Then he whispered in her ear a line from an angaran film, one about a man who loved a woman who was the moon.

The next day they were on the Nexus, and Sara was moving from praise to censure, then to Scott, talking to him but always in the back of her mind was the plan. It was a relatively simple and straightforward plan: beat the kett to Meridian and use the other Pathfinders as bait to keep some of the kett off their tails. It was a good plan, and best of all, it actually worked. However, it was with great disappointment that Sara went to bed that night. Jaal sat with her, discussing what would have to happen to actually find Meridian. Suvi had plotted all possible points to scour the Scourge for information, but other issues had arisen, leaving Sara to try to determine their next course of action.  
Jaal knew Sara had fallen asleep, and kept his arm around her this time. He wanted to sleep with her, not only have sex with her, which he also wanted, but mostly he wanted to wake up with Sara in his arms. Up until now he had always left, had always kept his distance, ever so slightly. But now, he wanted nothing more than to sleep with her in his arms.

Sara woke, a large purple/pink alien with his arms wrapped around her. Shifting, she could see he was awake, and she did what she had been wanting to do for such a very long time; she kissed him as the morning light of Podromos filtered through her windows.


End file.
